Once upon a time,
There was this dude.
He was happy and cheerful,
Never too rude.

Always happy to help,
Give a hand or two.
Ready out with the paint,
When someone seemed blue.

Meet Mr Too Nice,
He’s your useful friend.
Good ol Mr Too Nice,
Use him up till the end.

He’s the sort people like,
In a utilising way.
Friend of convenience,
Open every day.

Need something fixed?
Got a problem to solve?
Call Mr Too Nice,
Problem resolved.

Poor Mr Too Nice,
These aren’t real friends.
Good ol Mr Too Nice,
They use him till the end.

Say they’ll shout him a beer,
Keep in touch for sure!
Thank him for his help,
Wait until they need more.

Got a question to ask,
Have something to fix?
Mr Too Nice is there,
With his bag of tricks.

So months go by,
These friends disappear.
There’s no catch up coffee,
No friendly thank you beer.

Then one day he’ll hear back,
They say hi, how are you?
He responds in kind,
What do you need me to do?

He knows he’s been used,
Knows what to do.
He turns to the world,
Just exclaims a ‘screw you’.

It’s a case of Mmm Bop,
Mr Too Nice understands.
Soon he turns to the darkness,
Listening to death metal bands.

His smile turns first,
Like charcoal from gold.
From happiness and joy,
To a smirk that’s so cold.

People ask for his help,
He just stares with dismay.
Slowly reaches into his pocket,
So they back away.

Everybody is scared,
Mr Too Nice is gone.
In his place is a monster,
A villain like in James Bond.

He keeps wearing black,
Hides his face from the world.
Emotionless and cold,
Doesn’t even need girls.

Moves away from his ‘friends’,
Goes to higher ground.
Builds himself a hideout,
Nobody around.

He adds tall dark gates,
Reaching up to the clouds,
A castle with towers,
Even violent greyhounds.

Bats fill the sky,
It’s perpetual night.
The castle grows,
Nothing feels right.

Evil schemes are begun,
Mr Too Nice plans away.
He awaits their reaction,
Just what will they say?

First he gathers up paint,
Finds some gears and glue.
Builds himself a machine,
Time to make things anew.

With his weapon complete,
He goes back to his city.
Hides the machine in town square,
Knows this wont be pretty.

He watches from afar,
Crowds build at midday.
Holds out the big red button,
Fires away.

The noise can’t be missed,
Screams echo all around.
The machine worked,
People drop to the ground.

He laughs with a smile,
Loves what he sees.
The look on their faces,
Makes him so pleased.

The people are shocked,
Silence fills the town.
Everyone’s face…
They all look like a clown.

The red smiling lips,
Big red nose.
White paint all over,
Multicoloured afros.

People are in shock,
Confusion is clear.
Everybody wonders,
Just what happened here?

The plan worked so well,
Mr Too Nice can see.
The whole town in awe,
His face filled with glee.

People start to move,
The town’s silence breaks.
Then panic starts again,
Everything starts to shake.

People run to safety,
There’s nowhere to hide.
A stampede bursts through town,
Thirty elephants wide.

Trumpets play,
Unicycles appear all around.
Monkeys jump out,
Sawdust covers the ground.

Confetti fires from the sky,
Tightropes hang between trees.
Firebreathers roam around,
Roadies set up a trapeze.

The town folk aren’t too pleased,
Cursing echos in the street.
Some start fights with circus folk,
Many clown face fists meet.

A riot soon begins,
Angry clowns all around.
The fighting continues,
Until they hear a sound.

Somewhere within,
Amongst the brawl.
Children giggle playfully,
Despite it all.

Flowers ready,
Running around,
They squirt each other,
Laughter clearly sounds.

The riot stops at once,
Each person looks at their shirt.
Pinned on each one,
A flower to squirt.

Mr Too Nice loses his smirk,
A true smile comes back.
He retires his death metal,
Stops wearing all black.

The time is right,
His cloak drops down.
He’s dressed in colour,
A very bright clown.

He enters into town,
Joins in the fun.
Presses a button on his coat,
Suddenly he’s won.

Mr Too Nice takes the stage,
Pies fly out from everywhere.
It’s a mess of dairy all around,
The smell of cream fills the air.

Standing up high,
More clown than man.
They start to cheer,
He bows to his adoring fans.

Mr Too Nice quiets the crowd,
Waits and then speaks away,
This could have been worse,
What could have happened today?

Treat people right,
Give them respect.
Don’t ask for more,
Repay your debt.

Turns out Mr Too Nice was just that,
Riot police appeared all around.
No warning cry or negotiations,
One shot to the head and he was down.

The town stood still,
Some tears were shed.
Bearded lady couldn’t believe it,
Mr Too Nice was dead.

Arriving to the silence,
A fairyfloss stall.
This cold dead clown,
Supplied it all.